Tuesday 22 January 2013

Snow, Ice, Sacrifice

So while Australia fights off the bushfires and the record high temperatures, England gets snow, ice and a public transport system that still can't deal with it despite having it for the last 3 winters in a row, and pretty much every year in history. People continue to be stupid when snow appears, people continue to try to drive where they shouldn't and they get stuck. Doing it once? Forgiveable. Doing it multiple times? You're an idiot. Learn from your mistakes.

I mentioned before that a way of helping time pass is to have things to look forward to, breaking the time down. This is a technique that Jess has taught me. I've added another event to that... I am going to see Tottenham Hotspur v Arsenal on 3rd March. It's the biggest game you could possibly go to as a Spurs fan and let's face it, I'm not going to get that chance again so I planned to go with a couple of mates. Unfortunately Spurs have a policy where for the first week members like me can only buy one ticket, then after that week you can buy guest tickets. By the time the opportunity came around to buy guest tickets, the stadium had already completely sold out. Looks like I'm going to a North London derby on my own. I'll have to have my wits about me.

Just 4 days later I'll be going to see The Darkness with my brother-from-a-different-mother (and father), Matt. I have asked a few other mates if they'd like to come too because in all likelihood that'll be the last thing I can do in the UK with a bunch of mates. Obviously The Darkness aren't everyone's cup of tea, but to be with my mates at a concert with my favourite band? Can't be many better ways to leave the country. But the real dilemma is what I can do to assist the countdown during February. January is almost out of the way, and next Saturday is Australia Day. Not widely celebrated in the UK, of course, but I think it's only appropriate that I wear something with an Australian theme! But February is empty. There's Valentine's Day, but how can I celebrate that when my Valentine isn't here? We'll have our own Valentine's when we see each other again.

The countdown continues with just 81 days until decision day. Since my last blog I have learnt that people who applied for the same visa AFTER me have been told to expect theirs BEFORE me. If this was a one off, I could understand it because maybe there were special circumstances. But what I have learnt is that MULTIPLE applicants that applied after me are getting theirs before, AND they are normal applicants like me that have no special circumstances to consider! The only difference is the case officers handling the cases. It seems mine is sticking to the 9 month line where others are fortunate enough to have theirs granted already in some cases, and as soon as next month in others. Of course I realise there isn't a whole lot I can do about that but I think that I might call in February to find out what I can. Perhaps that can be my February event to look forward to?

I think it's natural to have doubts about things in life. I think it's natural to worry. Perhaps that's because all I do is worry. I worry about finding work in Australia, I worry about Jess constantly for a number of different reasons, I worry about something bad happening in the UK when I'm out in Australia and how I would deal with that or if I'd be able to come back if I needed to. Right now I worry about something bad happening in Australia while I'm stuck here in the UK. But do I have doubts? Yes I do, though none at all about being with Jess. There is no doubt in my mind that I should be with her, she should be with me. My doubts are about things beyond my control and to let go of those doubts and fears is proving to be the ultimate sacrifice. To end this post on a positive note, I am not allowing those doubts to consume me in any way. They are still there but I won't allow them to take control. I won't allow anything to come between Jess and me, I won't allow anyone to come between Jess and me. 81 and counting.

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